Pam

Just when you begin to think that life couldn’t get any tougher and

you finally feel like you can take a breath again, the universe

laughs and tosses you another curve ball. I wrote a while

back that two people in my life were battling terminal illnesses,

both of them had lung cancer. And whilst I knew

what the inevitable outcome would be, that at some point

I would face the rest of my life without them in it,

nothing can actually prepare you for the day it happens.

As regular readers of my blog will know my Grandmother

passed away on January 6th this year. Then on Friday 26th

January I was awoken with the news I had been waiting

for all night. That my dear friend of over 20 years had passed

away. In the last 12 months I have been through

5 bereavements, in the past 6 weeks three of them

occurred. To say I am at breaking point  is an understatement.

Losing Pam, is like losing a close member of my family.

We have in those 20 years been neighbours twice,

when I lived at my flat she lived on the floor below.

When I was being shown around the house I am

currently in, Pam leaned out of the back bedroom

window stating house prices would drop should we

decide to move in. When we came to view this house

we had no idea that Pam lived next door, as our close

friendship didn’t really develop until 2007 onwards,

although we had always been friends.

To sum Pam up in a few words is impossible,

when they made her they smashed up the mould,

pulverised its pieces and spread them all over

the globe purely because the universe knew there

was only room in the world for one Pam. She was

hysterically funny, whether she meant to be or not.

She had excellent comic timing and I have lost

count over the years how many times she made me

choke on my tea or got me to snort it out of my nose.

She would do anything for anybody nothing was too

much trouble. She has helped me and Jay out of

many scrapes at the drop of a hat. She was like that

with everyone she knew.

I don’t think Pam every truly realised how many people

loved her. I know she found it hard to comprehend

why all these different people were sending her

flowers, gifts and coming to visit her. She told me

she felt truly blessed and been particularly touched

by a lady who she had been to school with who had

tracked her down after numerous years

Pam knew people from all walks of life, if you ever

went out with her you could guarantee she would

know someone. It always used to make me laugh

that when I had tradesmen at the house to fix stuff,

I would find them outside chatting to Pam, she either

knew them or knew their mums. It was crazy the

amount of people she knew. So I have a feeling

when we say our final goodbyes the place is going

to be filled to the rafters with those who loved you.

So many people are hurting right now, none more

so than her family. I am so grateful to have known

you and to have had you in my life for the last 20 years.

Apologies for the text being in a weird position on the page. I am still having technical problems with blogger.